Field Notes From A Prayer Warrior

John 3:16–For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.

Matthew 28:6–He is not here; He has risen, just as He said.

From “Good Enough” by Kate Bowler–“So, blessed are we then who have been excluded, shunned, or forgotten, for there is One who knows us and loves us and walks among us. We know that we are not alone.”

I know that I am not alone.

The Lord has been with me…in the darkest valleys of my life…

I was rejected, not accepted, by some to whom I had opened up my whole heart. Classmates called me weird, ugly, too different, too nice, too religious, too brazen, too intense, too honest, too…embarrassing. I found myself taunted for shining, bullied until my light almost entirely winked out. Accomplishments…belittled and diminished. Dreams…laughed at (Paris?! YOU?…College?! How?). Abusers who told me it was my fault, or I was crazy, and that I’d NEVER make it without them…

With wounds still raw and exposed, accepting there might never be an apology, or even an acknowledgement of the pain inflicted…I forgave them…

Through His power…not mine.

No pain, no wounds that I have ever experienced come close to what Jesus suffered…

And He forgave it all.

With the humble heart of a servant, generously and compassionately, He healed bodies and souls, fed multitudes, performed miracles…

Yet the crowds and the Pharisees cried out, “Make more bread! Show us more signs!”

More! More! More!

“Do this, we’ll believe!”

“Do that, I’ll believe!”

And later…

“Unless I see the nail marks…and put my hand into His side…I will not believe.”

I believe.

I believe in Jesus.

I believe in His love and His sacrifice…His blood for our salvation.

I believe He rose from the dead, to life eternal…and that He walks among us.

We never have to be alone.

We can choose life with Him.

I stretch my arms out as wide as I can and tearfully, joyfully proclaim, “Jesus, I love You thiiiiiiis much!”

He answers…

“And I love you. This much.”

Arms open…on the cross.

The same arms that hold me now.

He is Risen! He is Risen indeed!

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